It starts small

a thin line



maybe it wouldn’t count but

it gets big enough to count

for seven whole years

of bad luck

i wish i couldn’t see it

i wish i could forget about it

maybe if i focus on the

very top of the line

maybe then i won’t notice

the sun-shaped spiral

the spiral that’s

symmetric but lopsided

the spiral that makes me want

to crack my mirror on the wall

on its right side too

so that its even

but no one’s ever said anything

about cracking a mirror twice

maybe the bad luck would

cancel out but maybe

it would double and

i can’t risk it

my mirror on the wall would be beautiful

if it wasn’t recently repainted

in cracks liked it when my mirror on the wall

was untouched and smooth and even

my mirror on the wall

was flawless and i didn’t have to worry about it

but then it fell and

my mirror on the wall became

as shattered as me and

maybe my mirror on the wall is beautiful

after all, beauty and horror go hand in hand

opposites attract

that’s what they say

but they also say i’m crazy

why else would i

refuse to walk under a ladder?

i don’t know-safety, maybe?

i’m not scared for my safety

i just

can’t risk it

they say my throwing salt

is making the floor dirty

not blinding the devil

but i throw it anyway because

i can’t risk it

they call me superstitious

they use the word

in the same way New Yorkers say schizophrenia

then they turn around

and search for a four-leaf clover

they call me crazy

bend down

and pick up that lucky penny

they laugh in my face

then knock on wood

as they said something was going well

i guess they can’t risk it

i don’t call them hypocrites

that’s bad karma and

i can’t risk it

my mother took me

too see a doctor

he said that i might have OCD

and recommended Fluvoxamine

i wanted to recommend that he jump off a cliff

but that’s bad karma

and i can’t risk it

besides i’m not really sure

how to take medicine

in a safe way so

i can’t risk it because

the crack in my mirror on the wall

matches the crack in me

it starts small

but it ends big


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