there was a boy

a boy i once loved

our friendship was first

and then came

our nonexistent love story

we knew each other for years

before i discovered him

his never absent smile

his deep brown eyes

the way he makes me melt

like chocolate chips in pancakes

before i completely fell

we became friends

everything

was our main topic of conversation

i tripped without warning

i fell

and my skull clanked

on the cold dusty floor

but it didn’t hurt me

i was too long gone

it was then decreed in my mind

that he was forever

and i was in love

i was unafraid to tell my friends

about my incurable infatuation

but he didn’t feel the same way

this i knew for a fact

as he had kindly informed me

that he was incurably infatuated

with my best friend

of course

he told me this information

because our main topic of conversation was

everything

upon his discovery of

my undying love for him

our main topic of conversation

became nothing

the bruise on my skull

that had never hurt at all before

now made the blood in my veins

pulse painfully

a kind of ache I had never felt before

and my brain took note

that this was what everyone called

heartache

after that melancholy

nonexistent love story

eventually the ghost of our friendship

came back to life

and i had to get back up off the ground

brush off the dust

forget about the bruises

caused by my fall for him

and start over

and keep starting over

i’ll fall a million times for him

until my bones are battered and broken

and our skulls have matching bruises